Sunday :/

Sunday did not go as I planned. We had my birthday party on Saturday and a few people stayed the night - which is fine, we don't mind. There is just one thing.. When I'm being nice enough to let people stay the night because they have no place else to go or would have to spend money on taxis to get home, I would expect them to respect me in my own home to not make shit loads of noise in the morning. It's fine if people get up early, but when I repeatedly told them the night before how tired I am and that Sunday is my only day off (only possible day to sleep in) - they should have tried to dial back the noise.

I had a long conversation with I a few hours after and we came to many conclusions - it was stupid of them to not think about respecting me in my home and it was stupid of me to get so angry about it and take that anger out on them. I should've been quiet and not said anything because as soon as I got angry, it stopped being about them doing something wrong and started being about me being angry. So the whole point was lost and everyone got frustrated.

I can't really blame people for that. I have so much against me. People can't understand why I might be angry about something so they just blow the whole thing off and call it 'Saara being Saara'. That is amazingly frustrating. Also, because they stayed in their pack after leaving my house, they automatically started talking about it amongst themselves, when it was meant to be between me and them.

I had this coming though. If I surround myself with people who aren't accustomed to talking about problems and not bitching about them or not talk about the problem at all and jump straight to the aftermath, then this is bound to happen at some point. I've tried to not say anything about anything nowadays but it doesn't seem to make a difference, because even if I say nothing for a year and then say one thing, it's like I haven't changed at all. Tricky tricky tricky.

Also my sister thinks I stay angry about things for a long time, when it's actually more like we never talk about any of our fights or problems or if someone crossed a line, so it's very hard to move past something when there is never any moment of apologizing or sorting the problem out. Something I'd love to do with her any time any day - but I don't think she feels the same way.

What a mess, the whole thing went from me being angry with them to them thinking I should fix what I have done. This whole thing could have been avoided if they would have let me sleep. Shoulda, coulda, woulda. No point in arguing about this anymore. What has happened has happened and it's in the past now. Hopefully all the people involved can understand what a mess my brain was on Sunday morning and how because of exhaustion I couldn't tell you nicely how much you hurt my feelings. I am sorry for my hurtful words, hopefully you can be equally sorry for your actions.

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Sunday <3

I love Sunday. Sunday is the day I get to sleep in and do as I wish. Of course there are some limitations to what I can actually do - like drinking. I couldn't possibly get drunk on Sunday because of work on Monday and I really don't want to be hangover on my only day off so that rules out spending Saturday night sippin'. I used to hate Sundays - that day before going back to school but now I've seen a whole new side of Sunday, and it's not that bad.

Also, this past Sunday I got to spend some time with a little princess. She has grown so much! I hate it. She should stay little and adorable. Soon she'll be walking and talking and that's going to suck. Not because I don't want her to do those things, but then she'll be able to walk away from me.. Now I can just hold her as long as I want. I've missed her so much lately, seems like there aren't enough hours in the day for me to spend time with anyone but my bed and The Sandman.

My friends J and J got engaged on Friday! They came into the shop yesterday and told me all about it. He got down on one knee and everything - just like in movies. I am over the moon happy for them! They are perfect for each other and I can't wait for their wedding. Although I think B and I should get married soon - it seems everyone is getting engaged and they won't wait as long as we've waited. I just don't see myself planning a wedding. It's a lot of work, right?

Well, I'm in work again. Feels like I live at Chydenia. But we're making the most of the time we do get to spend together so it's all good :) And after today, there are only 4 more working days this week and then it's Sunday once again :)

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Valentines Day..

..has been and gone.

I got B something I knew he'd appreciate and he loved it. We had the most romantic night! We started with this candle lit dinner (frozen pizzas while watching The Big Bang Theory), followed by a romantic movie night (more Big Bang Theory) and when we couldn't take it any longer, we moved the party to the bedroom. It was the best night of my life! Pure pleasure - sleeping deeply.
We've been working a lot lately so we're exhausted but it was still a very good Valentines Day.

We went out for dinner last night and afterwards watched two disturbing movies with I and B. We've watched these horrible, disgusting and all together awful movies for like 3 movie nights now. I think B might have had enough but we still have the foreign horrors left and they are usually more gruesome than the American horror movies. Can't wait! I is leaving town for a month so I've got to spend all the time I can with her before she goes..

It's been a really long week for me. A couple of early mornings (making the day even longer) and suddenly you're twice as tired as you would be if you got to sleep those couple of hours you now lost. I can't even begin to describe all the other places I'd rather be right now, instead of being at work. But I want the money.. I can tell you this much - I couldn't do this for more than a couple of months a year. Too tired.

I haven't had anything to eat today because E is treating me to a (not so healthy) dinner after work and I thought I'd save the calories and the room in my belly, for all that gorgeous food I am about to have :)

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Book One - Done!

I have now finished reading the first book of the year. I finished it last night and thank god for that. I still have time to read another book this month and get this thing on track.

The book I read is called The Passage by Justin Cronin. I was sceptical about the storyline in the beginning but as the story moved forward (it seemed to move painfully slow at times) it became more interesting and I didn't feel like putting the book down and giving up - that's always good. I wouldn't read it again - not because it wasn't good, but this particular book is one you only read once.

I would tell you more about it but this would go from a short blog post to a novel in a matter or minutes, if I started explaining the story. It was confusing at times but it all came together at some point and made sense. It had a happy ending but also an unhappy ending, sort of. Most of the main characters died but the world survived, so I guess mainly a happy ending.

I was thinking about picking up a less time consuming book to read for the remaining days of February, but I ended up choosing one that seems just as confusing as the first. Hopefully it ends up being as interesting as The Passage, because I only have two weeks to read it. That's more time than I need but I'm in work all the time so I really don't have time for 8 hour reading sessions..

It's back to work and if it's quiet, I'll get acquainted with The Witching Hour by Anne Rice.

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Work Hard, Party Harder..

..applies to those who actually manage to do some partying. I on the other hand - read some of my book and went to bed. Sunday was no different. I helped I with this thing, ate and watched a movie - a little later, bed. Driving home I saw a young man walking home from where ever he had been, and he could barely walk he was that drunk. That should have been me on Saturday. I just don't know how to party anymore. Or maybe I'm trying out Work Hard, Party None?

I still haven't finished my book. Shit. But I still think I can make it before the end of the month and read another book before March. This book has just got interesting at around the 600th page so should be smooth sailing to the end. I should probably pick the next book and keep it with me to start on as soon as I finish this one..

It's the beginning of a new week. A new 6 working day week. I still have next week to go and from that point on - I don't know. It could keep being like this, which I'm fine with just as long as I don't get sick. I mean, come on.. When I didn't work this much and had all the time in the world to be sick, I wasn't, so why now? Shitty cold and fucktard flu. Let's just say - we've always been close but never became friends.

Now it's back to work and sell, sell, sell! Have a wonderful Monday everyone!

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Halfway Point

I have now reached this in the book I'm reading. I haven't got as much time for reading as I've had before but that's not the only reason it's taking me so long to make progress - it's a very confusing book. I mean, the story isn't very confusing, just takes a lot of imagination and understanding but the way it's been written is just.. confusing.

There is a storyline but there's a lot going on in between that doesn't seem to have any purpose but to tell you more about the characters - there are a lot of characters and a lot of them die - so I don't see the point of having 10 extra pages written about their lives in the past or explain some story about something once happened to them.

Timeframe is also quite blurry to me. It feels like a lot of time might have passed and then suddenly you realize it's only been one day - the movie 1408 anyone? - or that it has somehow jumped a year into the future.

I've never read a book like this, but Stephen King gave it a really good review - one of my all time favourites - that I just had to read it. It might take a little longer because honestly, this is weirder than Stephen King books but I'll get there and finally find out the answers to all my questions. Although I'm not quite sure about that one - this book doesn't provide you with backstories of a lot of the important stuff you'd like to know about and focuses more on the people. That would be fine if the story wasn't about so much more than just people.

I'm not going to get into the details on the story because quite frankly, I don't know how to explain it without sounding like an incoherent child, so instead I will wait until I've finished the whole thing. I need to keep on reading now - at least another two chapters - to maximize my chances of finishing this book in time to read another book before the end of this month.

At least one book a month, right?

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No Longer Dropless January

The alcohol ban ended last week on Friday. I should have posted this then, but you know me - do the blog, ignore the blog, do the blog again.

So there I was, in the shop, picking four of my favourite ciders to drink on Friday. Got home, watched some programs, drank two of the ciders and went to bed. Getting drunk wasn't the idea and that's why I only got a few drinks in but I thought I'd at least get the four down. No longer used to alcohol or getting old?

Saturday I was in work, but only til 4. I went straight into Alko and the shop after I finished and then home for a little bit. I picked up I and H and then it was party on! I took it slow to start with but it didn't take long before I was drunk but happy drunk, not wasted out of my mind drunk. S and J came around and it was altogether a great night..

..until we decided to go into town and hit a few bars. It didn't take long for be to realize B was wasted, when he wasn't even supposed to drink and it was downhill from there. When I finally got him home, it had turned into a ridiculous spectacle. But after some showers, sugar, water and sleep - we managed to (somewhat) turn it around.

I ended up going to sleep at 7am and woke up at 11.30. This was not in my plan but that's when B got back from work and I wanted to get something to eat. Thank god I only drank water for all of those hours in the bar, so I wasn't feeling particulary hangover and was sober enough to drive, so no one had to walk to the shop.

We got home and B made chicken curry. We all thought we wanted a meal the size of a horse but in actuality we were only able to eat the amount a small bird would eat. But it tasted fantastic. S and J didn't stay late - they went to pick up J and went home - probably to sleep bit I doubt that was possible with J. I wanted to stay up until bedtime but I ended up falling asleep at around 6pm and only woke up at 8am the next morning.

Yesterday I worked, went to the shop, ate, gave E some reiki energy for her back, watched some programs, got a shower and went to bed. Nothing exciting. Just some quality time at home with my boo. Haha. Today will be no different.. I was supposed to work out a few times a week but last week (when I started) I only worked out once so I really got to pick it up. Today could be that day. No! Today will be that day :)

That's all for now. Have a nice day!

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